Rekindle the Spark

I want... To know that I am a beautiful person, and that my Heavenly Father loves me. To be a gorgeous, well conditioned, creative, and inspired dancer. To do well in school, so that it can be a real reflection of my greatest intellectual potential. To live the gospel more righteously, so that others will know about God through my actions. To know and be friends with all my ward members. To be on time, all the time. To do well in my job and always strive for excellent service and work. To fall in love and be loved back. To marry my best friend. To raise children with the man of my reality (not my dreams, because then he wont disappear when I wake up) that I will love for eternity. To have someone hold me at night when I fall asleep, and we could cuddle and I would feel safe in his arms. To be in the best health of my life, and be fit by eating the right foods in my diet. To exercise daily, and feel good about myself. To begin every day with a prayer and end every night with a prayer. ...

If I walk would you run If I stop would you come If I say you're the one would you believe me If I ask you to stay would you show me the way Tell me what to say so you don't leave me The world is catching up to you While your running away to chase your dream It's time for us to make a move cause we are asking one another to change And maybe I'm not ready But I'm trying for your love I can hide up above I will try for your love We've been hiding enough If I sing you a song would you sing along Or wait till I'm gone, oh how we push and pull If I give you my heart would you just play the part Or tell me it's the start of something beautiful Am I catching up to you While your running away, to chase your dreams It's time for us to face the truth cause we are coming to each other to change And maybe I'm not ready But I'm trying for your love I can hide up above I will try for your love We've been hiding enough I will try for your love I can hid...

The beginning of my composition piece. It's always a work in progress. And here is a video at about where I am during midterms (half way through the semester). And playing with music... And a final rough draft... But still not content with the music, and it's still a work in progress. Oh well, time's up. Stay tuned for the final performance! :)

Some nights... you just want to cry... and you don't know why... I'm going to the movies by myself...because I can't handle this anymore...

So, I'm sitting here at work...thinking...that I can't think of a time, when I'm not thinking...LOL. But yeah, first, I still have to post all those blogs about all my fun adventures that I've documented on my camera. And I'll try to get to that later today...if not definitely tomorrow. But on another note, I've been particularly thinking about how I'm getting OLD. Now, I know I'm not OLD as in ANCIENT...but my look is changing. It's interesting how as a little kid you're never really aware of how your physical look is actually evolving and aging and even maturing. But I feel like, when I look in the mirror now, I've seen physical changes in my appearance, that I just don't have any physical control over anymore. No make-up or clothing can change the fact that I have dark baggier undereyes than I did before, or that I'm just an older person now. And the cruel reality is that I certainly don't feel as pretty as I did last year. H...

Moving out can be a very stressful mess. But being the last roommate to move out, can be a person's worst nightmare. Let me see, it started out when I received a letter in the mail on August 4th stating that I needed to be out of the apartment by August 16th, which was a Sunday. Thinking I had plenty of time to move out, I noticed Vanessa moving out early because she was engaged and already moving things into her new house. Low and behold time snuck up on me, and it was became the move out week, unfortunately due to poor planning I had a full week of work scheduled as well. But I figured that I still had the whole weekend to move out. Big mistake! On the morning of August 14th, the Friday before I was suppose to be all moved out, REMS management slaps a note on the front door saying you have to be out by "August 14th," just as I was leaving the apt to go to a full night of work. I laughed...You can't put a note on someones door, and say you must be out by "...

Have you ever had a gloomy day in the office? It's raining and the window view of the gray stormy clouds can have the most subtle affect on your general mood bringing you slightly down in energy, and reflective at thought. As I left the office that one rainy evening during the summer season, I was doing some personal reflection, and things felt pretty lower than usual in my mood. But then I looked up into sky, and I felt a sense of relief and kindness, and a warm glow in my heart grew as I noticed a double rainbow smiling back at me. I'm not sure what it is about rainbows, but since my childhood rainbows have always cheered me up instantly. When people asked me what my favorite color was I always said "I love rainbows," and what my favorite ice cream was, "I love the rainbow ice cream" (which was really sherbet mix). Anyone who knows me, knows that I love dressing in bright colors too! For me rainbows give off a feeling of magic. I like to imagine that...

I should probably let you all know that as I worked my 3 jobs during the summer, I started to feel exhausted and overworked, and because of my fatigue I wasn't able to give 100% in all 3 job environments. So even though I would have loved to keep all three jobs of ABA Therapy, Custodial at BYU, and the AMP Call Center, I decided to end my time working with Tate in ABA Therapy in July, and continued working with my Custodial job and AMP. As school began to approach in the fall I was aware I could not keep both jobs, and I began to wonder if either job was right for me to keep with my school schedule after summer ends. With the custodial work, church had taken a back seat in my life, and I didn't want that to continue being a problem in my life. So I made the decision to end things with my custodial job, even though I had achieved a promotion as the WILK Weekend Crew Restroom Supervisor. This left me working AMP in September, but even then I didn't have a secure position i...

My best friend Tiffany recently wrote a blog on the things she is grateful for...and I thought to myself..."Self! Whenever we are down and the weight of the world feels like it's on our shoulders, we must always remember to recognize the things we are grateful for!" So Tiffany...thank you for reminding me that even when we feel like we have nothing, there always is something. :) Things I'm grateful for: 1.The Gospel (The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints)- It is the one thing that truly makes sense in my mind and my heart. Nothing is more comforting than my personal testimony of the Holy Ghost, Jesus Christ, and Heavenly Father. The fact that I know they are all real, and that they love me unconditionally, and want me to live worthily so that I may live to my fullest potential on Earth, and return back to live with my Heavenly Father some day. I can feel the hand of God in my life, I know he is there, and he listens, makes me aware of the needs of other...

My childhood friend, Amy, posted a blog with ten things that all started with the same letter! Her cousin gave her the letter she used, and then after reading her funny blog entry filled with thing's that started with the letter "K," I asked Amy to give me a letter! She gave me my letter of "M." Being skeptical, I thought this would be hard, but a list of 10 quickly became a list of 21, so I went back, and chose my top ten to share with y'all. And here's what I came up with . Ten Things I Like That Start with the Letter "M": 1. Mother. Well, this was the first thing that came to my mind when thinking of the letter "M". The sweet image of my dear mother. If any of you know anything about my mother...you've probably heard me mention how crazy she is! But what I mean by crazy is that I don't know where she gets all her energy from, at the whopping age of 29 years old (Haha! Or so she'll tell you that she's that ...

Sooooo disaster today. I go into work at AMP, and I realize, "BLAST!" They blocked us from having access to Blogspot on the internet! Ridiculous! Come on now! First facebook, and now my new love of blogspot! ARRRGGG! But no worries. I'm hooked now...They can cut blogs out of work, but they can't cut blogspot out of my heart. Haha! Well, hmmmm...I'm not sure there's anything new to report about on here. I havn't been up to much of anything as of lately. Oh ok...here's a funny story. So me and my friend Aaron from work, have been talking about hanging out for a long time now, but never do anything about it. So we make arrangements to have an awesomely fun Kareoke night...Let's do killer Korean Kareoke Party!!! Basically the Kareoke machine is made by Koreans so in the English songs, all the background videos are of Korean people walking on the beach, or Korean animations that dance in crazy outfits, etc. It's really quite funny. Anyways, on Satu...

So lately, I've been staying up past midnight...and I get the strangest cravings for something sweet, or a delicious snack to satisfy my sweet tooth. I don't have the energy to go anywhere and buy something, so I get this crazy idea, that since I have boxes of cake, and instant cookie dough in the fridge, I can bake some goods and save myself the money. So I get all the stuff out, and do what I need to do for my baked goods, and then I pop them into the oven. Sounds easy, right? WRONG!!! The weirdest thing. I, for the life of me, get so excited for my goods, but then I can't manage to stay awake long enough to hear the timer go off. Sometime between my excitement in baking, and mixing the ingredients, or simply putting the cookie dough on the cookie sheet, and into the oven...somewhere along those lines...I lose it! I completely pass out into a deep sleep, long enough to burn whatever it is I'm making. But I don't sleep longer than 30 minutes past the time I was sup...

In honor of a little blog post titled "Gio's Niece," posted by my sister Ligia, I dedicate this portion of my blog to the impeccable resemblance of two very good looking babies. My niece, Chrysalis Rae, with her beautiful mother... My mother, Eloisa, myself as the little child sitting on her lap, and to the right is Ligia... With matching shoes, to the matching expression...I think...no...I know! We must be related. And of course, MINT GREEN is the bomb-digity!

So, I love the first song in my playlist on myspace. The name of it is "You're So Good For Me" by Sonnet. If any of you want to check out this rising starlet, check it out my myspace playlist or go to lagoonpark.com and click on the tab that says music download. You can download some of her music for free and also check out her music video. She's so pretty and has an incredible voice. I love her, love this song, it's such a feel good sound...good vibes!

Hey hey! Well...even though I swore off my blog last year, if you're reading this...I guess you'll be glad to know I had a change of heart. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know. What happened?!?!? Well, Ligia (my older sister) twisted my arm into it. Now that she isn't living in Utah, nearby me anymore, she's picked up on her blogging and totally neglected the fabulous world of facebook. And well, I miss her, and her kids, and in order to keep up with the latest news on her family, I'm constantly having to read up on her blog. So I started to sign online to check out her blog, and tried once again to set up my blog and decorate it. So with some guidance from my older sis-tah as to how to decorate my blog and how to make all these gadgets work, I think I am now ready to start taking this blog thing more seriously. I don't know if anyone will read it...other than Ligia, and maybe Tiffany, or Jake. But that's ok with me. I'm not doing this blog to impress anyone. Just ...